A view of autism from along the spectrum

For my last post on this topic, I’m going to change the definition of ‘full disclosure’. When it’s your blog, you can do things like that.

I first wrote about being forthcoming about autism to our children on the spectrum. I also advocated making sure that they are identified as autistic on their educational plans for the schools and teachers.

For everyone else, we must go out of our way to disclose the entire person that our child is. Autism is only one aspect of who they are, it does not define them. They have many other qualites and characteristics that deserve to be part of our disclosure.

When we introduce people to one another, we never feel the need to tell each one every detail we know about the other. Instead we disclose a few items that are relevant. Similarly, we can tell people who our children are without focusing on autism. We can even introduce our children to people without mentioning it. We are no more obligated to bring up autism, than we are to point out an intense dislike for green beans. We can talk about their relationship with siblings, their likes and dislikes, or the toy they just got and won’t put down. By focusing on the entire person, we set an example for others and for our children. There are many adjectivies that describe our children, autistic is only one of them.

There was a time I felt the need to provide explanation for some of the non-typical things my children did. This need was driven more by my own lack of comfort than anything else. I’ve since developed a sense of confidence in both my children and my own skills as a parent. My boys are so much more than a few quirky behaviors observed by others. As parents, we set the tone of how they are percieved. I intend to set a tone that adds to their self esteem and shows the acceptance and respect that I want others to have for them.